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United States United States. DJ since Apr 12, 2009
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AlBorland Passed out drunk on 9/11 woke up 9/12 my dick was only half hard, i look at it as a flag flying half mast. It was really profound. God bless America.
AlBorland I once fucked a bean burrito fresh from taco bell, got 3rd degree burns on my shaft, but damn it was worth it.

MelvinsWith Teeth

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AlBorland I have a hole in my wall that opens directly to the left of my neighbors living room tv, ill stick my dick in it and stand still for hours he likes it


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AlBorland I once got caught fucking another mans wife, he tried to fight me but then i shot his knee and ran his leg through a blender, they got a divorce
AlBorland riding through chitown to this beat, ran a motherfucker over with my car, got my dick hard, wanna fight about it?
AlBorland fuck queens of the stone age and josh homme, i can relate to this song though.
AlBorland i did acid to this song, crawled through a forest, and carved a hole into a tree and fucked it to this song, it was fulfilling.
AlBorland got my dick bit rly bad to this song, still has a scar on the bass, never deepthroat a bitch with braces, especially if its forced.
AlBorland sorry i havent been on lately, tried to pierce my dick and nearly severed it.
AlBorland Thats more like it, back off cocksuckers


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AlBorland Im sorry but what the fuck is this shit. It sucks.
AlBorland I got my first boner when i felt the doctors hand touch my head when I was being born, so technically i lost my virginity to my mom before i was born.
AlBorland I put viagra directly into my urethra and made a hooker suck it out like a straw. wanna fight about it.
AlBorland Signed up on then realized I'm Al fuckin Borland and closed that shit down and had sex with one of my sons teachers in the middle of class.

Macy GrayI Try

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AlBorland My neighbor was selling his car but he had no soap to write the price on the windows, i did the neighborly thing and beat off onto the windows
AlBorland Just saw 2 girls 1 cup, pretty tame compared to some of the stuff ive done to my bosses kids, just sayin.
AlBorland My pubic hair is flannel. This unique feature has worked against me in a few rape cases, nothing major though.
AlBorland Can't wait to get my passport to N. Korea approved, the whole damn country is an untapped pussy mine and im gonna prospect the shit out of it.
AlBorland shitpissfuckcuntcocksuckermotherfuckertitsfartturdtwatshitpissfuckcuntcocksuckermotherfuckertitsfartturdtwatshitpissfuckcuntcocksuckermotherfuckertits (reblip)

UsedFamily Reunion

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AlBorland shitpissfuckcuntcocksuckermotherfuckertitsfartturdtwatshitpissfuckcuntcocksuckermotherfuckertitsfartturdtwatshitpissfuckcuntcocksuckermotherfuckertits (reblip)

UsedFamily Reunion

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